World of Cretisium

The story

Learn the history of Lord of the Dumbs and its world Cretisium.

The story of you

Lord of the Dumbs tells the story of you… the one that starts as soon as you are teleported to the unbelievable, magnificent, stupid and evil world that is Cretisium. There, you will be immediately welcomed by a strange green character, a bit smelly and downright ancient, who goes by the name Austarog Dubisuj. And he will not wait long before entrusting you with a task that is far from simple: to save his world. To do so, you must recover the Lost Intelligence that was stolen many centuries ago by the appalling Drack Garnomor and his Council of Nine. A theft that caused the entire world of Cretisium to succumb to absolute Stupidity.

Austarog will go on to explain that you are the Sunham, the Chosen One, and that the Great Prophecy passed down from his ancestors spoke of your arrival and destiny to fulfill this mission. What is a Sunham, you ask? Good question! A Sunham is an intelligent being that comes from another realm that has the ability to summon the Dumbs: creatures that perfectly resemble the inhabitants of Cretisium which will materialize in the form of cards. Practical, is it not?

You will have to use your Dumbs to fight all the enemies that will try to block your path during your journey through every corner of Cretisium, which comprises of three regions: The Upperites, Middlerth and World Frumunder. Be prepared for encounters that will be as colorful as they are funny, dangerous, moving, mysterious, tragic and heroic.

If the story of Lord of the Dumbs seems simple and light at first glance, you will be surprised by the quick turn of events. We wanted to write true story of adventure, both surprising and profound, that at the same time immerses you in a rich, realistic world, thanks to a consistent and well-worked mythology. A tale full of humor, yes, but one that also darkens into a tale of mystery, magic and drama.

Cretisium and its regions

If upon your arrival Cretisium seems to be a world completely immersed in Stupidity, know that it was not always so. Cretisium was once a prosperous and wealthy world, populated with scholars, thinkers, architects, doctors, engineers, powerful magicians and great philosophers. The height occurring in a time we refer to as the Age of Illumination, a period spanning 800 human years, just before the Intelligence was stolen by the horrible Drack Garnomor. But even at that time, the land was divided into three distinct zones:

World Frumunder: This is the southernmost region, with an extremely hot climate which is magnified by molten lava, rocks and thick smoke. The topography is very mountainous with almost no vegetation. At one time, the inhabitants were very warlike beings, extremely skilled in armed fighting and decked in superior armor, living among astounding architectural marvels: fortresses, citadels and the most impressive Orkania Library. Unfortunately, the only astonishing thing about them these days is their innate ability at hitting each other over the head.

Middlerth: As you might guess from its name, Middlerth is the central zone, once known for its architecture, agriculture, gastronomy and technology. Many inventions were created in the laboratories of Middlerth, the proof being in the amazing towers, castles, villages and monuments that still exist. However, in considering the population today, this is hard to believe. In fact, it has been ages since any bright ideas have come out of this region, and we don’t have any great expectations for the future.

The Upperites: The Upperites can be found in the uppermost region of Cretisium and has a very rich and diverse terrain: mountains, lush forests, towering waterfalls, deserts, glaciers… No doubt a landscape that would take your breath away! This region, however, was prized for much more than its scenery. At one time it was renowned for its respect for nature, advances in ecology and sustainable development, uncommon medical knowhow, great philosophers, majestic temples and most importantly the impressive City of Arboria. But much like the neighboring regions, the disappearance of the Intelligence did no one any good. And without their prior knowledge, there is a great void…

Celebrities

Austarog Dubisuj is the first character you will meet upon arriving to Cretisium. Originally from the World Frumunder, he is playful, mischievous, and endearing, and at the ripe age of 102 human years, he will be your faithful companion throughout your entire journey.

For that is his mission as stated by the Great Prophecy, which had been passed down from generations, and ultimately entrusted to Austarog by his father Camernock on his deathbed. But much more than a guide, Austarog will become a true friend.

A not-so-good magician and evil only since the day he granted himself the title, Tivoltine is dangerous primarily due to his self-importance and healthy dose of aggression.

He is the first enemy you will fight in order to save Omar, the taverner of the Stiff Pony Inn. Tivoltine took possesion of the Inn by trapping Omar in the cellar. Even worse, the guy had the audacity to raise the price of Chocolate Milk. What a scandal!

Jackie Ham is an exceptional thief, quite charming, agile and strong. You will first meet her in the Suspended Village, in the south of Middlerth. Though we cannot say that she is "smart," we can include her in the group of "least stupid” characters you will encounter during your adventure.

Her rather memorable trademark is dyslexia, which in a way makes her even more endearing. How could you not be charmed by her phrases that inadvertently turn her into a poetic pillagess?

 

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